What I want to eat in Austin, TX

I'm going to visit the University of Texas, Austin this weekend and while doing food research came across this: The Mother Clucker

YES!  That is, in fact, a donut topped with fried chicken.  Just one of the many intriguing offerings from Gourdoughs Specialty Doughnuts that might make me bend my vegetarian and gluten free leanings.  Seriously bend. 

Fucking chicken and waffles incarnate!  Last year (before leaning completely vegetarian), I was hit with a mad craving and went on a crazy search for chicken and waffles.  Sadly, while I found decent offerings, what I found in the Twin Cities did not impress and did not satisfy the craving.  This trip may be the answer to my long awaiting craving. 

What helps my body image junk

This photography project: The Nu Project.  When I have particularly bad body image junk days, I have to make a conscious effort not to look at images of unrealistically thin women in catalogs or on entertainment websites or even Etsy.  Seeing a diverse range of women with real bodies helps me accept my body however it is.

And being mindful of language I use that suggests beauty and image as women's only worth: see this article of 12 body-shaming habits to squash.  In the past, I received a lot of negative reinforcement of my image when I was suffering from depression related weight loss (more on that story here) while working in a clothing store.  And I have been guilty of giving unsolicited advice, hating on others because I'm jealous/insecure, and attributing other's desirable traits to circumstances out of my control (see the "Minimizing another's successful weight loss" slide). 

I am also fortunate enough now to live with two men (my boyfriend and my father) whose love for me feels in no way attached to my appearance and to work in an environment (university engineering graduate school) that embraces other traits over appearances.  I am grateful for these things everyday.

What I need to work on: succinct writing

I read this article on LinkedIn: My Secrets: How I Became a Prolific Writer and Learned to Get Beyond School Essays.  I like the points Vivek Wadhwa makes about writing from the heart, being succinct, and keeping the tone informal.  My struggle is that when I tell stories to friends, I tend to ramble so when I write, I equally ramble. 

Though in the article, Wadhwa suggests just writing and not bothering with the rambling high school 5-paragraph essay format, I want to make sure I think about what message I'm trying to convey before I start writing or storytelling.  Knowing what I want to say before I start trying to say it.  If I can identify and stick to a main point, I will know if I've made my point and what information is important and relevant to it, and not get wrapped up in too many details. 

Unless I'm talking about pie, and then all the details are important :-)

What I need to work on: Saying No

If you ever find me being squirrely and not responding, being generally evasive and poorly behaved socially, it's probably because I need to say no and I don't know how to do it gracefully.  I get attacked by a bunch of Catholic gulit, Minnesota Nice, or Good Girl-itis and freak out.  Usually, the no comes but the situation has been needlessly complicated by my general stinkiness.  This post from Alexandra Franzen can help us all with 5 easy steps to say no, keep up our boundaries, and invest in our own sanity all while being up front and totally non-stinky.

What made my brain hurt this week

I watched the documentary Miss Representation and as I told Pretty Pie, my face melted.  It discusses how the media under/mis-represent women and the effect it has on women and girls, their self image, their political efficacy, education, and EFF, I sat there slack-jawed for about 2 hours.  Things I had never thought of before--how naked Tinkerbell is!  Our "enemies" China, Cuba, Iraq, and Afghanistan have more women in government than 'Merica. 1 in 4 women are abused by a partner.  They talk about painting women as bitchy and overemotional to take away their power and also how the portrayal of women is hearkening back to the 50s when women were only valued as objects. 

I want to say a really bad cuss but I REALIZE IT IS TOTALLY MISOGYNISTIC.  Effing eff.  I am really glad to have my eyes opened to this epidemic but also feel a bit powerless to fight global media conglomerates and political parties.  International Women's Day is coming up quickly so I'm hoping to come up with some kind of action that will give me a warm fuzzy about this topic.  But personally, it has made my brain klunk.  Questions it brought up for me:

1) What the hell am I doing in the gym 900 hours a week?  Shouldn't I be using that time to change the world?

2) What the hell am I doing performing burlesque?  Was it more subversive when I was more overweight?  Is it irresponsible?  Is it actually feminist or am I participating in something that smacks of patriarchy made palatable by claiming empowerment?

3) What the hell can I do about this mess and how can I celebrate and support women?  What if there are some women I plain old don't like because they are effers?

5) What the hell about skirts?  I love skirts.  And glitter and Katy Perry and the pink and purple shirt I'm wearing and heart earrings and quilting and cooking and nail polish and flower pattern everything.  Am I hyper feminine and is that bad?

4) Mostly a big fat effing "WHAT THE HELL AM I UP TO AS A WOMAN!?!?!?"

I don't have any answers but I guess the discussion is the point?  No one's going to have a perfect answer but I do agree things need to change overall and that change starts with me...while wearing a skirt...or something.  Anyway, totally worth getting from NetFlix or whatever and getting all worked up over!  Do it for the ladies!

Decor ideas I'm loving

From this slide show about mixing prints and patterns, I love these two bedrooms:

I love the gray tile floors and the simple colors and the variety of textures.

Some day I will decorate and be daring in my decorating, and it will be beautiful. 

What I want to wear

Ignoring the ridiculous looking model and that its a bridesmaid dress and that its from David's bridal (call me a snob but these are all things that would make me inclined to dislike this dress), I love this dress.  Like Bettie, I'm dreaming of those (hopefully) not-to-distant summer days. 

I also don't wear watches (or any jewelry for that matter any more) and I prefer silver jewelry, but this watch just caught my eye.  I love the colors.  Maybe this liking-things-I-wouldn't-usually-like is a sign I am moving closer to being more daring.  Maybe.

Where I ate this week

We had friends visiting from São Paulo, Brazil this week and it has meant two things: I now desperately want to go to Brazil and we ate out a lot at:

Wise Acre Eatery is one of my favorite restaurants.  I love the food, I love the decor, and I always appreciate the vegetarian options.  The vegetarian winter entree right now is a farmer's pie that I can't get enough of!  And the sell rendered lard!  Not that I cook with it (much) anymore, but I'm always excited to see people supporting the use of good, home rendered leaf lard.

Before it became Wise Acre, the garage space was home to Liberty Custard, who made some of the best frozen custard.  Its also where Pretty Boy and I went the first time we ever hung out.  When Tangletown Gardens took over the space and turned it into a restaurant, they thankfully kept frozen custard on the menu. 

Mandarin Kitchen in Bloomington, MN is pretty much my family's go-to Cantonese style Chinese food restaurant.  They have my favorite dim sum in the Twin Cities, but I usually can't handle the long waits and oppressive crowds that come with their weekend dim sum service.  They also have some of the most impressive and delicious seafood dishes, which I sadly do not eat anymore as a vegetarian.  Its the saddest I've been about being vegetarian in the 10 months since I've become vegetarian, but I'm so glad our Brazilian friends really liked it.  

What I want to do this summer

Go to a Pizza Farm! 

I'm hilarious!

Options nearby MPLS:

A to Z Produce and Bakery has a pizza night on Tuesdays from 4:30-8pm.  It's in Stockholm, WI which is also home to the *second* best pie in the universe at Stockholm Pie Company.  Two delicious birds with one stone.  Plus, you can ride blue bikes in town...I sort of love Stockholm. 

img from http://openplac.es/trips/a-to-z-produce-bakery-in-stockholm-wi-54769

LoveTree Farmstead in Grantsburg, WI sounds like a a place I want to eat pizza.  I guess I should explain it's Valentine's Day today and I'm wearing a flowery top that's peach, orange and pink with a red cardi and red flower, heart earring I made, 1000 bracelets, and red and pink glittery stripe socks.  Hell yeah, obnoxious.  Anyway, the are all about recycling and reusing and pizza camaraderie.  Plus, they have goats that they will let you milk.  I don't want this to be snarky but I would expect rainbows and My Little Pony to be very nearby, which would make me feel right at home since there will be glitter in my car and probably on my face as I eat their pizza!  Check FB for days/hours.

The Stone Barn in Nelson, WI has a dining room!  Ooh la la!  Apparently they don't make all their toppings but that's OK with me because they are open on the weekend--Friday, Saturday, and Sunday from 5-9pm.  Hooray!

Suncrest Garden Farm is in Cochrane, WI sounds like they cater more to families but they do serve beer and encourage campfires and s'mores.  I'd love to bake some bacon and pretend that it would make it there for bacon s'mores but a road trip with bacon sounds futile.  They are open Thursday and Friday from 4:30-9pm and randomly have live music.

Now we just have to get through the -10 windchill tomorrow and get onto spring so I can get me some pizza!

That looks like effing pizza paradise!

What I need to drink

I studied abroad in Spain in college and they had a delightful tradition of curros con chocolate.  Henceforth, my expectations of hot chocolate are way too high.  I want my chocolate to be thick and viscous, somewhere between syrup and frosting.  McDonalds, Dunn Brothers, Stabucks, etc need not apply.  On a recent road trip, I did try a salted caramel hot chocolate from some crap chain and it was crappy crap.  My friends didn't even let me finish it, there was too much whining about wasted calories and faith in humaity.  Churros and cocolate, you haunt me.

Look at that beautiful chocolate! NOOOOOM!

I have done a little research around Minneapolis and did make it to Wilde Roast Cafe to try their mint hot chocolate.  I appreciated the cute wafer and the whipped cream, but it still wasn't up to my ridiculous standards.  I thought that the Birchwood with all their hippie goodness might be a worth a shot.  I even explained to the guy about what it would need to live up to and he said it would.  Liar, liar, pants on fire.  A friend gave me some sipping chocolate and honey as a surprise Christmas gift that you brew like coffee and given my complete inability to make a decent cup of coffee, I managed to make many cups of entirely indecent hot chocolate.  I tried all kinds of different milk to make it the think consistency of my dream chocolate, loads of honey and sugar and syrup and sweetener, but my woeful skills with the French Press killed any chance the chocolate had. 

I want to take up the search again!  I need delicious hot chocolate, despite the insanity of the standards.  I've been encouraged to cross the river and try it at Kopplin's.  La Belle Crepe is supposed to be tre Euro, very earthy and delicious.  I've also heard good things about the Segue Cafe and Rustica, but I'm scared to go to Rustica and eat all of the chocolate cookies instead.  This article with the Top 5 from City Pages might be a good list to start with and then maybe cross the river...if I have to...I'd honestly rather pay for another plane ticket to Spain!

Where I want to go when my brother gets married

My brother lives in California, he's getting married in September.  I am going to eat donuts at Psycho Donuts every day while I am there.  Better bring extra Spanx.

Strawberry Margarita!
Filled with tequila pastry cream, this donutrocity is topped with strawberry icing, freeze dried strawberries, vanilla drizzle, and margarita salt!

What I want to cook this week

I'm not a vegetarian anymore, mostly because I'm lazy and institutionalized.  I do like to maintain one meal vegetarian daily and one day a week I go meatless, usually Monday because as previously stated, I'm lazy and institutionalized so Meatless Monday works for me.  This also maintains that I still say obnoxious stuff like "Too much meat for me!" so I'm still just as annoying as a regular vegetarian while still guiltlessly enjoying the occasional bacon s'more. 



OMG, so wrong and so tasty

Anyway, have I mentioned I'm lazy (and institutionalized)?  That means the slow cooker is one of my most loved and abused kitchen appliances.  One of my meals is usually vegetarian and the other was usually cooked in my awesome red Crock Pot, which recently appeared at the Minneapolis Burlesque Festival full of vegetarian Tater Tot Hotdish.  Sooooo, back to the recipe at heand, this vegetarian slow cooker chili recipe has sweet potatoes, which I eat every day, cocoa, cinnamon, and black beans.  If it does not turn out delicious, I will be really mad.  And eat it anyway.  

I don't like this photo, the background is UGLY!



What I'm eating today

Paczki!  From Kramarczuk's!  They only make paczki once a year for just a few days around Fat Thursday and I feared I wasn't going to make it this year but I did!

Babka, also from Kramarczuk's, listed as one of their specialty sweet breads.  I've never had it before.

What I am thinking about hard core lately

I have a job, it's a 9 to 5 and is just OK.  It pays the bills but it wasn't what I went to uni to do and certainly not close to important to humanity, like they told you in uni everything you would touch would be after graduation.  It's an office job, paper-pushing and monotonous, and everyone ALWAYS has a case of the Mondays, even on Friday afternoon.  I'm reaching a breaking point with this job, which has been a long time coming so back up plans and escape hatches are being wildly searched out in the hopes that my sanity, soul, and self-respect can fly away while there's still hope for resurrection on the other side.  Some of my options would include not having a 9 to 5 schedule and I think that night be a nice change, having been in this predesigned lifestyle for over 10 years.  This article on ThoughtCatalog about the 8 hour workday and it's effect on spending is super interesting and thought provoking, as I have been examining money as it relates to where I make it and how I spend it.  Perhaps Stabucks and nannying would be good for the pocketbook and the soul? 

But the 8-hour workday is too profitable for big business, not because of the amount of work people get done in eight hours (the average office worker gets less than three hours of actual work done in 8 hours) but because it makes for such a purchase-happy public. Keeping free time scarce means people pay a lot more for convenience, gratification, and any other relief they can buy. It keeps them watching television, and its commercials. It keeps them unambitious outside of work.

Thoughts?

What I want to try with my hair

My hair has one look.  Or only one that I can make it do, the stylist at my salon said the possibilities are endless but I can't seem to figure it out.  Translation: I don't make time to play Hairstyle Saturday Night and then whine about it.  A lot.  Anyway, this would be a fun and easy way to punch it up!  Hair chalk!

What I want to decorate my house with

Prints of this amazing painting called The Dress by Nancy Ramirez

Allover wall stencils available from Royal Design Studio.  I especially like many of the Japanese and Moroccan stencils.  I'm going to be super cranky in the future if I every have to just pick one

Or in lieu of actually painting on a pattern, WallPops peel and stick wall art!

What I'm reading right now

The Institute on the Environment at the University of Minnesota's publication, Ensia (Environmental Solutions in Action), featuring environmentally related topics and information

Having read The Joy Luck Club, The Kitchen God's Wife, The Hundred Secret Senses, and mostly recently The Opposite of Fate over the course of the last 15 years and long been a tremendous fan of Amy Tan, The Bonesetter's Daughter